How to Lose your Geek Card

I remember when I first realized I was a total Geek. Honestly, it felt awesome… like finally belonging. Growing up I fit into many categories, and switched back and forth between many clicks, never fitting totally into one. I thought that meant I didn’t belong. As an adult, I now realize that means I belong to more than one place. Instead of one negating the other, one enhances the other. I can love sports and still be a geek. I can totally not understand anime, and still be a geek. I can be a wild and crazy chick and a total goody goody all at the same time. I can be girly, nerdy, wild, and strong.

It  took a few years after this revelation to hear the term “geek card”.

Urban Dictionary says this of Geek Cards: Requirement to be accepted as a respectable member of the geek community. Can and should be revoked by other respectable geeks for doing non-respectable-geek things.

For those of you still as clueless as I was, this infers that when you become a geek you receive a(n) (imaginary) membership card. There are, of course, requirements to be a member of the Geek club… and there are ways to become expelled from the group as well.

Instantly, either from my depression induced paranoia or my confusion of where I belonged in school, I needed to know whether I was a card carrying member. I’ve decided since that time that I am, indeed, a card carrying geek. There are, however, levels of Geekdom. It’ll be awhile yet before I reach platinum status, or even gold.

 

So, I’d like to tell you a bit about the application process and how easily you can have your Geek Card revoked.

First of all, there are two types of geeks: the culture geek and the science geek. I would define the difference by example of content consumed by said geek. For example: Sam Winchester is more of a science geek, whereas Dean Winchester is more of a culture geek. That reference, also, is a culture geek reference.  Nicolai Tesla inspires a science geek. Somewhere in the middle, red shirt and sonic screwdriver references tie together the two types of Geekdom.

 

On the Application process:

You must be able to “check” ____ or more of these items off.

  1.  You have a theory on how the apocalypse event will happen. You likely have literary or other geek-inspired “evidence” to quote & base these on.
  2. You’ve seen all of one of the following:
    1. The Original Star Trek TV series (3 seasons)
    2. All Six Original Crew Star Trek movies
    3. The original three Star Wars movies (IV, V, & VI, episodes I, II, III, VII not required, but do help).
  3. You know Batman’s origin is from (_______) comics while Captain America hails from (_______) comics. It may also be necessary to know their everyday Joe names, and one of each of their villain opposites.
  4. You know the movie Blade Runner was based on a book by a different name, and you know the name of said book. Bonus if you’ve seen the movie AND read the book.
  5. You’ve played an RPG more than once.
  6. You have been “obsessed” with one or more video games. Anything and everything included: Mario Brothers to Star Fox, Centipede to Mine craft.
  7. You’ve played the Sims, and knew what the code word “rosebush” did.
  8. You are a repeat offender at the comic book store, always looking for a couple of specific issues.
  9. You are personally offended when movies and remakes do not “stay true” to the original.
  10. You have an opinion on whether zombies are fast or slow.
  11. You have at least one “geek” movie, book, video game, etc. that annoys you to the core, while loving something else that others believe are eerily similar (Star trek vs. Star Wars, DC vs. Marvel, WWC vs. D&D, etc.)
  12. You can quote a movie/series with ease, and find it difficult NOT to quote said movie/series/book daily.

Revocation of one’s Geek Card may be Instant if one or more of the Following Occurs:

 

r2d2
Confusing robots results in instant revocation of your Geek Card.

 

bianry
Not knowing what this is, or where it is used, may result in instant Geek Card Revocation.

 

geek squad
Taking your electronics here, may result in revocation of your Geek Card.
vs.
If you cannot pick between Star Wars & Star Trek, your Geek Card WILL be revoked. Don’t lie, you may like both but ALL geeks have a favorite.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

xmen
If you’ve never owned an action figure, your geek card may be revoked. The jury is still out on the necessity of it being in or out of its original box.
spock
Finally, if you have no idea what this means, I personally revoke your Geek card.

 

Each individual card carrying geek will, of course, have their own list of card-revoking offenses. It is up to each individual, however, to determine their own membership approval. Note that some groups are quick to turn their noses up &/or “revoke status” of other members based on interest. This, much like football season, can be as simple as an argument over whether you are a true sports fan based on your knowledge of the sport, rules, and players names. Do not let these geeks walk all over you. We all have some things we don’t know. We cannot know everything about the Geekiverse. (and printing off a new self-made geek card is, like, super easy.) =D

 

 

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